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There's a wrinkle in the Amish heater ads the article fails to point out. Read it carefully: You don't buy the heater--they GIVE you the heater when you buy the wood cover of your choice. With that wording, the implied guarantee of serviceability applies to the cover and not the heater.
"Heater doesn't work? Too bad. Now if the cover falls apart out of the box, that's another matter..."
Shawn: English 101 is a college course, way to advanced for the deputy clerk. She needs a refresher course in 8th Grade English. And Spell Check on her word processor.